EMMERDALE

Will the happy couple get to say ‘I do’? It’s always the million-dollar question, and now Emmerdale embarks on its first trans wedding.

Matty, you may recall, was originally Hannah, and in the beginning bi/gay, before returning to the show as trans. And now he has the girl of his dreams in Amy (keep up!), but their big day is threatened when Kerry fails to come up with the money to pay for it.

She was banking on getting enough from selling her necklace but receives only a pittance.

No surprises there; everyone’s jewellery in that village makes Christmas cracker trinkets look like the Crown Jewels.

There’s good news, though, when Leyla takes a mystery call and the wedding is back on – as I hope subtitles will be if Geordie Amy gets to say her vows.

Let’s hope life runs more smoothly for them than it has for Tom and Belle. Bumps along the way?

We’re talking Canadian Rockies. When Tom goes on a trip, he spends his time watching Belle’s every move on the puppy cam. You’re barking up the wrong tree, mate; she really isn’t that interesting.

Tracking Belle’s faulty phone to the scrapyard, where Vinny has fixed it, Tom panics and whacks Vinny over the head with a paperweight.

Have you noticed, in soapland, paper is the last thing on a paperweight’s mind, as it’s always at the ready, preparing to be a weapon of mass destruction?

Grateful as she is for being free, Rhona is still anxious as she seeks custody of Ivy. Can she trust Gus when he offers to plead guilty to hasten the proceedings? This has been some lengthy storyline. Don’t be an egg thief would be my advice.